She found limited resources to help her, so Foo set out to heal herself, and to map her experiences onto the scarce literature about C-PTSD. She thought she'd moved on, but her new diagnosis illuminated the way her past continued to threaten her health, relationships, and career. After years of questioning what was wrong with herself, she was diagnosed with complex PTSD - a condition that occurs when trauma happens continuously, over the course of years.īoth of Foo's parents abandoned her when she was a teenager, after years of physical and verbal abuse and neglect. But behind her office door, she was having panic attacks and sobbing at her desk every morning. I want to have words for what my bones know.īy age thirty, Stephanie Foo was successful on paper: She had her dream job as an award-winning radio producer at This American Life and a loving boyfriend. A searing memoir of reckoning and healing which investigates the little-understood science behind complex PTSD.Įvery cell in my body is filled with the code of generations of trauma, of death, of birth, of migration, of history that I cannot understand.
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